Voice of Experience
   Young ex-addict tells what drugs did to him, his family

The following essay was written by a young Tri-Cities man, 18, who is suffering the legal consequences of extensive drug use when he was 15 and 16. His message may serve as a warning to other youth, not from some addictions “expert” – or from a broken-down, old druggie or some preachy adult – but from a sharp and fit young man who now counts his blessings, and may have salvaged his family and his life.
It’s too soon to tell. So far, so good. He’s come farther than many. But there’s a lot of temptation ahead – and a lot of history behind – for this man we’ll call “Sam.” Here’s his abbreviated story.

Perils of Illegal Drug Use

I am writing about the danger of illegal drug use and what I would like my younger brother and sisters to know about my personal experience with drugs …

Using drugs can cause you to become moody and irritable. Your body will start to rely on the drugs to feel better, and when you don’t take them your body will either withdraw or make you become extremely moody until you find your fix. During the time that you are withdrawing from your drug of choice, you will feel tired, angry, weak, uncomfortable, and you do not have any patience for the people or the situation that you are in. 

I felt that I lost control of myself and certain aspects of my life because I had to rely on drugs to control my moods. At first, drugs are fun to use, but then they take hold of you and it is no longer recreational and fun. My advice to you would be not to ever get involved with drugs at all, because it can take over before you know it … you become a slave to the drug.

When my family first learned that I started using drugs, I know I disappointed you all. I went from being a participant in the family to avoiding any social event, including Christmases, birthdays, and special family events because I wanted to spend time getting high. I know many family members were disappointed in me, and instead of making things better in the family by joining in, I avoided all family functions on purpose. This made all of our relationships more strained and stressed, and by using drugs I alienated myself from the people I loved the most. I didn’t realize that starting to use drugs would take me away from my family and rob me of time that I cannot take back or relive.


I would like to warn you that the feeling of getting high will win over the feeling of being sober, even if it means you are going to hurt the people you love and that love you. 

If I could take anything back, it would be the way I treated my family during the time that I used drugs the most. I was not trusted by my family, and I did not trust myself. I would lie and steal to get what I wanted – to get high … When you use drugs, you only think that you are affecting yourself. You have no idea of the affect it has on the people around you.

I know I caused a lot of strain and grief to our parents and that our family almost broke up because of the stress drug abuse can have on the whole family. I know many times that everyone was afraid of my behaviour and outbursts. I am truly amazed at how accepting you all are of me, now that I have turned my life and my attitude around.

You may not think that drugs will get a hold of you and come between the people that you love, but I am telling you that I am lucky to have my family at the end of all the pain and suffering my drug abuse caused to my family.

When I used drugs, my good reputation as a friendly fun kid disappeared overnight. I stopped hanging around my good friends and started hanging around with kids that were druggies. My good old friends soon did not want to be around me anymore, and I am sure their parents didn’t want me around them either. My parents started hearing unfavorable things about me, and I am sure that was devastating for them because everyone loved me and I had a good reputation with kids and their parents.

Quite often Dad would have visitors at his shop that had met me in the neighbourhood, but soon those visits stopped and were replaced by the police. Almost every weekend the police would be knocking on the door wondering if I had involvement in some stupid crime or activity. I cannot imagine the grief and embarrassment this caused you all.

Drugs and school do not mix. I got into trouble in school almost daily because I used drugs, and it affected my ability to stay in school. I would rather be getting high than go to school and concentrate on my work. Drugs made my dyslexia that much more difficult because I got angry outbursts and I gave up that much easier, and I would get angry and just go out and get high. Soon my teachers no longer wanted to help me, as I was not cooperative, and teachers do not want to help people that do not want to help themselves. 

Since I stopped doing drugs, all my old friends started coming around more often wanting to do things we used to do. I bought a BMX bike and I started biking again. I got my snowboarding gear out and spent time on the mountain doing stuff I loved to do before I became dependent on drugs for fun. My relationship with Mom and Dad started to turn around and the trust factor was back. I started working steady and realized that there was more pride and self respect in working for myself, instead of finding other ways to get what I wanted to get high.

One you have lost your self esteem and self respect, it is easy to give up on yourself. You start to view yourself as others view you, and the cycle continues. Now that I am a productive member of the family and the community, I have respect for myself and I am gaining respect from others again. Drugs take away yourself respect, and they also take away the respect others have for you.

One implication you could suffer if you get caught with illegal drugs is that you lose your freedom. You will find yourself in a bad predicament that has ramifications that you (cannot) fix by yourself. I found myself in front of a judge for something stupid I did without thinking of the consequences.

I (was) found with drugs in my possession. Even if I wasn’t going to take those drugs, in the eyes of the law, I was a drug user. There is no convincing anyone that I didn’t intend to use them. Worse than this, I cannot cross the border to visit Disneyland. Being unable to go into the United States is something that will last me my lifetime, for a weekend that I thought was going to be fun.

My drug use took my freedom and my privilege to travel out of Canada, even though I have changed my ways. The law will continue to look at me in a negative way, as I cannot change my past. This was a tough lesson to learn.

I hope this essay will help someone. It has taken me a long time to learn these lessons myself, and if it benefits someone, it will be worth it.